“Karma Police, arrest this man…”

Note to the person who just royally screwed me over (again!) this afternoon. You have messed with this SAHD for the very last time, amigo. The Karma Police have been informed of your actions and as my new favorite movie character, “Machete”, would say: “You just fucked with the wrong Mexican!” Heads will roll…

“Grey Gardens” Greta

Spent most of the morning trying to convince Greta that her gigantic, two-and-a-half-year-old noggin is just too big to fit into her favorite 6-12 month-sized dress. And lemme tell ya, it was brutal. Tears, yelling, throwing, more tears, and that was only on my end. So, finally, I give in and let her wear her favorite dress exactly the way she wants to.

And this, my friends, is what it looked like. Eat your heart out, Little Edie!

The future is now…

OK, so, over the weekend, I totally visited the future, and you know what, it’s today. Seriously! After dinner Sunday night one of us shouted: “Hey, let’s rent ‘Rango’ tonight!” So, I call our video store — yes, we still go to an independent, non-chain video store and it’s awesome! — and ask them if they have the movie. Unfortunately, it’s already checked out. Suckage…

Normally, that’s where this story would end because I’ll only go into a Blockbuster Video if it’s on fire, and there are cute, baby animals inside in need of rescue. But tonight, I decided to try the future instead. So, I Googled “Red Box” on my iPhone, downloaded the free App, clicked here, clicked there, and in less than a minute a copy of “Rango” (on Blu-Ray no less!) was waiting for me to pick it up at my local Red Box stand. I shit you not, it was that easy. All I had to do was pick it up.

And ten minutes and $1.65 later, we were watching the movie on our TV at home. I swear to God, if that’s not the future, than I don’t know what is…insanity!