“The LEGO Movie: Everything Is Awesome Edition”

If you missed The LEGO Movie in theatres earlier this year, the DVD/Blu-Ray hit stores yesterday, so, now’s your chance to catch this epically cool flick on the small screen. And if you did see the movie and loved it as much as we did, then, you gotta check out the “Everything is Awesome Edition” which includes a DVD, Digital Download, two Blu-Rays (one in HD and one in 3D) and, best of all, a LEGO minifigure of Morgan Freeman’s character, Vitruvius!

That’s right, you get an actual LEGO toy with your movie. Cool, huh? The only complaint Greta and I had is that Vitruvius doesn’t come with his iconic chewed-up sucker cane. As you can see, we were able to craft him something similar-looking from our ever-growing LEGO collection, but, an actual cane accessory would have been nice.

And in case you were wondering how the movie holds up on second viewing, all I can say is that we watched it together tonight (It was my Father’s Day gift from Greta and we’re kinda making the holiday a weeklong event this year!) and I’m already looking forward to watching it again. Yep, it really is that awesome!

Oh, and if you’re looking for a deal on the movie, the lowest price I found anywhere this week online or in stores was $34.99 at Best Buy, and while I’m not a huge fan of the home of the Geek Squad, I am a fan of a bargain, so, guess where we bought it?

Happy LEGO Movie release day, amigos…keep on bricking!

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Date Night TV: “Girls”

I should start by saying that up until about a month ago I had sort of a love/hate relationship with Lena Dunham, the writer/director/creator of HBO’s hit series Girls. And though I know it’s never cool to judge a filmmaker by their personal life — if I did I’d have a hard time stomaching Woody Allen movies too, which I love! — but after watching Dunham’s feature film debut Tiny Furniture on DVD about a year ago, I couldn’t stop hating her. Don’t get me wrong, the movie was great and explores many of the same issues and even character types as Girls does.

The problem I had with Dunham’s movie is that it was released by my beloved Criterion Collection, whose main objective, as I may have stated here before, is to release “a continuing series of important classic and contemporary films”. Yes, Tiny Furniture is contemporary (it was released in 2010) but I think it’s still a little early to tell if it’s “important.”

And then I learned that Dunham is from a family of New York art world superstars — her father is a painter and her mother and frequent co-star, Laurie Simmons, is a well-known photographer — who no doubt circulate in the same hip, underground crowds as the Criterion Collection execs do. So, then I hated her even more. In my mind, Dunham was nothing more than a privileged rich kid using Mommy and Daddy’s connections to make so-called “indie films” that debuted on the freaking Criterion Collection! Urgh…so lame!

The problem was though, I still loved the movie. And then Girls came along and I loved that too. Correction, I more than love it. Mrs. Yeti really likes it too, but, I’m kind of obsessed with the show right now. And then I started reading and learning more about Dunham and I realized that, parental art-world connections or not, she really is talented as all hell. So, when we finally got HBO last month, I put my own professional jealousies aside and started watching season one of Girls from the beginning. And it was fucking hilarious!

Sad, funny, goofy, dirty, real, authentic, it’s one of the best-written shows I’ve watched in a long time. Dunham and her amazingly gifted cast are a joy to watch each week, especially when one (or all) of their lives are spinning wildly out of control. Oh, man…it’s fantastic. And season two, which started three weeks ago has been even better. I have actually taken to writing down memorable quotes from the show on my iPad. Yes, I’m that kind of fan.

The only problem that I can find with Girls so far is that it is not even remotely kid-friendly. In fact, the other day Greta came into the room while I was trying to watch it and even before anyone said or did anything profane, Greta said: “Daddy, I don’t think I should be watching this show.” Ha! And she was right, the next scene would have required way too much explaining to a toddler. So, I put on The Princess and the Frog for the twentieth time instead.

But, if you and yours happen to have a night to yourselves, one of those cherished “date night-ins” that have become so chic of late, then pop in the first season of Girls and go to town. Seriously, you will laugh your ass off. Truly groundbreaking stuff!

The Purple Plague

Oh, the joy of sick kids. On Tuesday, Greta came down with a nasty stomach bug that left her unable to keep anything down. Actually, she did eat two mini Popsicles yesterday, but, aside from that, nothing. Even water and juice came right back up. It hasn’t been pretty.

The only good thing is that she slept a lot, which meant that I got to sleep a lot too. So, I think that almost balanced out all the sleep I lost from getting up every couple of hours to help her yak and change her nightgown and stuff. Mrs. Yeti, on the other hand, has been totally screwed sleep-wise. Sorry, honey, I owe you a few good naps!

Oh, and then, another wonderful thing happened last night. I wear a tiny mouthguard when I sleep to keep me from grinding my teeth and last night it felt out of my mouth and landed in the toilet while I was peeing in it. Nice, huh? Luckily (or unluckily, as the case may be) for me, I was so immune to cleaning up disgusting things by that point that fishing my mouthguard out of the pee-filled crapper was easy. I mean, at least it didn’t land in Greta’s barf bowl!

And on top of all that, Greta checked out her first Barney DVD from the library. Yes, that Barney. Mrs. Yeti took Greta to the library on Monday night, and, in her sleep-deprived stupor apparently forgot about our ban on the purple demon. Urgh…forget about Greta’s measly stomach flu…the purple plague has been unleashed on our home. Enter at your own risk!

“Cinderella Diamond Edition”

If you’re a movie geek like me, then you’ve probably bought you fair share of animated Disney films on different formats over the years. Personally, I’ve bought some Disney movies FOUR times over the past twenty years, once on VHS, again on laserdisc, one more time on DVD and finally, once again on Blu-Ray. Crazy, huh? The thing is, I kept thinking: “One day, my child will cherish these films on INSERT FORMAT HERE.” Never in my wildest dreams did I think that the viewing format would change four times before my kid starting watching movies. Yikes…I guess that’s what we get for waiting so long to have kids.

In any case, Mrs. Yeti and I decided last year that we would not re-purchase any of the classic Disney animated films when they were “released from the Disney vault” onto beautiful Blu-Ray editions. Nope. If we had a DVD of the film — which we do, for most of them, at least — then that would have to do. Yes, I know…it’s sad to think of poor Greta watching the lowly Platinum Edition of a Disney film while a sparkly new Diamond Edition was on store shelves. But, come on, how many times does a man have to buy a damn movie?!

That said, all of our best laid plans went out the window last week with Disney’s Diamond Edition release of the movie classic Cinderella. Yep, we fell for the sales pitch. Even bought the movie within days of it’s release and everything, but, we had good reason. See, this Cinderella comes with a DVD, a Blu-Ray and the all-important digital download. Yeah, I know, those sneaky bastards at Disney found a fifth format to make me buy…urgh!

But, trust me, that digital download is a life-saver, especially if you have a iPhone (or iPad!) savvy kid who likes to watch their movies whenever and wherever they want to. And, digital download aside, this is one hell of a Diamond Edition.

The Blu-Ray image is gorgeous, the new menus are beautifully rendered and the extras are truly spectacular. Sure, there are a bunch of hold-over extras from the Platinum DVD release a few years back, but, there are also loads of new extras that really make the movie shine. My favorite two are a new short film about the woman who inspired the design of the Fairy Godmother entitled:  The Real Fairy Godmother, and a quirky little short about shoe designer Christian Louboutin and his efforts to design a modern-era glass slipper. Sweet, oddly-moving and beautifully-shot, the live-action short isn’t even mentioned on the box but Greta loved it and so did I.

And if all those cool extras aren’t enough for you, the Blu-Ray disc also includes the animated short: Tangled Ever After. Picking up where the 2010 feature film left off, the short follows the goofy hijinks that Maximus and Pascal get into at Razpunzel’s wedding to Flynn Ryder. It’s very cute and surprisingly-clever, but, I still think Rapunzel looks better with blonde hair than that dishwater brown she has at the end of the movie. But, hey, who am I to criticize a Disney Princess?

Oh yeah, and best of all, since we bought our Cinderella Diamond Edition at Best Buy, we also scored a free plush Lucifer (the mean cat!) doll as a gift with purchase. I think Greta would have preferred plush helper mice instead, but, hey, free is free.

So, if you haven’t bought Cinderella a hundred times before and are looking for a cool Christmas gift for the little princess on your Christmas list, this is one Diamond Edition that’s well worth buying. And in case you were wondering, I was not paid for this endorsement, I’m just a big old Cinderella geek. I wrote a Cinderella script of my own a few years back and came to really love that plucky blonde orphan. I mean, say you will about the Disney Princesses, but, Cinderella at least had a job and, you know, a strong work ethic and stuff. And if you ask me, Cinderella is the most-modern of the classic Disney Princesses. I’m hoping that’s why she’s Greta’s favorite too. But, something tells me it’s all about those groovy glass slippers for her.

Either way, check out Cinderella on Blu-Ray today!

Library Karma

OK, so, two weeks ago Greta was manhandling one of her favorite library DVD’s, “Hercules”, and she broke it. Actually, more like, cracked it in half. That’s right, DVD’s crack and even break, especially old-ass rental DVD’s from the library. Who knew?

So, what did I do when I took it back? Like all good parents I pulled out the cracked “Hercules” DVD and told the smiling woman at the loan desk that I wasn’t sure if it was broken when we got it or if we did it ourselves, but, in any case, the DVD was unplayable. I know I should have just told her the truth, especially with my daughter half-watching me while I did it, but, hey, I didn’t wanna have to buy a new one for the library, so, I lied.

And guess what happened? Nothing! The librarian told me that this kind of thing happens all the time and that she’d put a sticker on it saying that it was already broken when I got it. Whew…in a perfect world, that would have been the end of the story. And it was…until yesterday when I returned a heaping pile of DVD’s to the library only to learn that they were three days late and that I owed a whopping $12.00 in library fees! TWELVE DOLLARS!

For only two more dollars I could have bought a new copy of “Hercules” on DVD at Amazon. Wow…karma really is a bitch. Lesson learned, Library Gods, I will not lie to you again…

First day back…

Today was my first solo day back “at work”, and lemme tell ya, it sucked. It wasn’t Greta’s fault, she was actually really good for large chunks of time today, but rather, it was me. I guess after two-plus weeks of having two parents around, I lost my touch or something.

I didn’t leave her in the car or anything like that, but, seriously, every little shitty thing I could do wrong today, I did wrong. For instance, pulled out some meat to defrost and left the freezer cracked open for like, hours. Looks like Superman’s fortress of solitude in there, ice everywhere!

Then self-checked-out — and can I just say how much I hate self-check-out anything? I mean, WTF? Machines like that are not a frazzled parent’s friend! — a bunch of books and DVD’s from the L.A. Public library to help celebrate the fact that they are open on Mondays again. Yay! But in my zeal to participate in this very big day for the libraries, I forgot to self-remove the locking mechanism on the side of the DVD boxes, which means, none of them will open. Of course, didn’t discover this till AFTER the library was closed, so, you can imagine how much fun it was to explain to a sobbing Greta why she couldn’t watch “Barbie Presents: Thumbelina” tonight after dinner: “Sorry, kid, Daddy fucked up. But, here, look at the pretty pictures on the box!”

And then, on top of all that, found out that a large chunk of money that I am owed is not only not coming my way anytime soon, but, may, in fact, never be paid in full. Ah, the glamorous life of a Hollywood screenwriter…

If I could punch this fucking Monday in the face, I totally would. You sucked, dude.